I can’t really talk about this with anyone IRL because everyone knows everyone else… but this rage has to be quenched or it will spill over…
This is our granddaughter Amber. Picture was taken 3 years ago, but she basically still looks the same.
Now a happy, lively 11 year old. Creative, empathetic, intelligent and I think, pretty. Cute as a bunny’s nose.
Always sewing or wanting to cook, she did make a dish for her family night before last. The bitter, twisted crone that is her live-in grandmother pronounced it “the worst thing I’ve ever tasted” and then proceeded to tell Amber that she is UGLY.
Amber cried for an hour.
God forgive me for what I’ve been thinking… all the ways to cause that woman pain… She needs to suffer. She’s never been what you might call ‘nice’, but that was horrible. And I can do nothing except love on that beautiful little soul when I see her this weekend.
What is wrong with people??
I am furious that anyone would say such things to a child! Can I get her address so I can send her letters telling her the same thing?
I just can’t even imagine what could possess someone to be so vile. Does she have dementia? If not diagnosed, she should be seen by a doctor immediately. That’s just not acceptable behavior.
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I wondered about the dementia, because she doesn’t take care of herself and she is diabetic. Nasty Grandma lives with them and they are used to her horrible behavior – but it’s getting worse.
The girls were here last weekend and Amber didn’t seem to be emotionally scarred… especially since I let her eat anything she wanted. LOL! I didn’t spoil, just pampered… 😉 Trust me, she knows she’s not ugly; we all tell her endlessly how gorgeous and talented she is and she eats it up! 😀
I spent a week in a boiling rage, but now that I’ve seen the not-ugly-at-all child, I’ve calmed down.
Thanks, Joanie! ❤
Even though Amber may seem unconcerned with all of the negativity from Mean Grandma, the effects over time can and do add up.
Girls have it so hard in this world. There’s such importance placed on them to look a certain way, behave a certain way, aspire to certain things. Regardless of the strides made in levelling the playing field, girls always seem to be judged by very specific standards and it takes its toll on the psyche.
I’d nudge Amber’s mom into having a serious talk about the Mean Grandma, if only because her words are toxic and the impact may not be fully evident until years from now.
At the very least you’ll have said your piece and can rest a bit easier.
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You’re right. Exactly right. I’ll talk to her mom. Thanks Joanie!
I’m sure everyone’s hearts are in the right place and finances may require Mean Grandma to be there, but at a certain point her presence might do more harm to many, including to her.
I know with my own grandma that my mom held out as long as she could before having Grandma placed in skilled nursing. It was only after a series of small strokes that she realized how much care was needed. Unfortunately, once she was there the full extent of her health problems became apparent and everyone kinda connected the dots between her behavior and her health.
I know I’m probably overreacting, but I feel for Amber (and everyone in the family) because it’s just so damn hard to be a kid, let alone a kid who is the object of negativity… especially at this time of her development.
Hugs all around!
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The witch owns a place in Miami that she rents out. I say sell it and move back to Columbia, like she’s been threatening to do for years. She’s sick (obviously) and not happy. I think her leaving the country would make everyone happy.
She’s OD’s husband’s mom (once again, obviously) and he turns a blind eye to her bullshit. It’s ridiculous. If they can’t control her (I know how that sounds, but respect and courtesy has apparently gone out the window), then give her an ultimatum. That’s what I’d do, anyway.
It’s so damn hard to put a parent in a facility. Even if that’s the best place for them and even if it’s gorgeous and the staff is awesome. It’s like a death. The end of something. I can’t see that happening here unless something drastic happens.
I’d be very honest with OD. That’s the only way anything will happen. At the very least you’ll have said your piece and you may plant the seed of necessary change.
I’m keeping y’all in my prayers and sending virtual hugs.