May as well be at Alcatraz

I’ve been working at The Rock, conveniently located in my front yard. When the world was new all this was lovely. The rocks were clean -which makes a huge difference!- the plants young and vibrant… and of course there was a damn sight more of both.

The plants… well, some were stepped on enough by painters to finally die… I pulled others up because they were too ugly to live and I do believe the rest of this mess is going to go. I hate the yellow and green foliage almost as much as I loathe the rocks.

Even rocks wear away with attrition, which means I take them for the bottom of my pots, use them for filling in holes and the neighborhood kids throw them at each other. Which would be all to the good if there weren’t so damn many left. Gah! Mulch is so easy; you simply get in a new batch every spring and freshen things up. Rocks suck. Ever tried to move a bunch of rocks? Every action requires back muscles.

Anyway, here are the ‘areas of concern’ as Suzette would say. At least one bed will be going, as soon as I can feel my legs again. That mess ‘o palms sort of in the middle I’d like to mulch if I can raise the back of the bed up enough.

Suggestions?? I can’t seem to grow hibiscus, though every other house on the street has at least two varieties flourishing. Love crepe myrtles, but I’d have to order what I want, as none of the local nurseries stock much.

Getting a new door and I’m thinking a nice, deep red. Too much? It would make a change from the unrelenting white. But the yellow stuff must go. I am unanimous in that.

Of course I had to take a photo of the flag snapping in the not.a.sea.breeze. And no, those two pictures aren’t exactly the same.

Click to embiggen.

33 thoughts on “May as well be at Alcatraz”

  1. davek

    Dunno Ms. Pam…

    Maybe you should just get you a “wrist rocket” so all them rocks would be a near inexhaustible supply of ammo if/when the zombies attack…

    davek
    :texas:

  2. wRitErsbLock

    I have no advice on how to get rid of the rocks. I loathe mulch. When we moved in, we were weeks and weeks and weeks and weeks scooping up all the mulch. I imagine they’re both equally horrible to get rid of.

    Yes to the red door.

    Yes to ripping out the yellow/green across the front of the house.

    Across the front, have you considered dwarf pomegranates?
    http://sphotos.ak.fbcdn.net/hphotos-ak-snc3/hs446.snc3/25575_381768117810_501567810_4320773_8172483_n.jpg
    http://sphotos.ak.fbcdn.net/hphotos-ak-ash1/hs466.ash1/25575_381768097810_501567810_4320772_374645_n.jpg
    In that first pic, you can see about how tall they get, and how small they can be and still fruit. Second pic is a close up of the leaves and a flower bud.

    I’m all about edible plants, though, so you may not want to go by my yard!

    You can get some ground cover plants that will eventually fill in, but take years to do so. Like some types of jasmine, I think. Or some really fun grasses. I can find them at the nursery, but don’t know what they’re called. But they are low maintenance. And I think the jasmine does well in shade, too.

  7. wRitErsbLock

    of course, if it were my yard, I’d rip out those bird of paradise plants! Great is my hatred! And I’d replaced them with bananas.

    I also highly recommend strawberry guava for a low hedge. You can prune it to your preferred size. The leaves are a gorgeous deep green year round. Fruiting right now. The flowers are white. The fruit is green, about the size of a strawberry when mature. The fruit is green, will pinken as it ripens. Tastes good. We bought one, and ended up buying 3 more the next year. Love it. It’s our replacement hedge!

  9. pam Post author

    WB, I LOVE YOU! :rofl:

    The dwarf pomegranates look made to order and I love the creeping jasmine! Thank you!!

    :worship:

    Oh, I hate the bird of paradise because I have to keep ripping it up; it’s almost as bad as the ferns that I just dug up out of the bed to the right!

    1. pam Post author

      Wrist-Rocket ProTM Introducing the worlds fastest, smoothest and the only slingshot that is lockable!

      Just the thing for those extra large spiders, too… :thumbs:

  11. patti

    mulch for me equals two full dump truck loads every second year (should do it every year but don’t have the energy OR the bucks for that) but I have some very rich dirt thanks to many years of mulch decomp.

    red door, yes – that’s what we have

    i have some hibiscus that we call rose of sharon up here :D

    have fun

    1. pam Post author

      I don’t think I’d need that much mulch… though there are beds in the back that are crying out for it…

      On the plus side, I’ve never had to get in a new truckload of rocks.
      On the minus, the rocks don’t decompose.

      I came up with the red door when someone a few blocks away painted theirs red. Their house is like ours, little Florida house, white on white. It’s beautiful, really stands out.

  12. Kim @ What's That Smell?

    Well considering I just “schlepped” 5 loads of river rock in a wheelbarrow to my front planting bed ON PURPOSE, I don’t have the same rock aversion.

    It all looks wonderful to me…we have NO landscaping – just rocks LOL

    1. pam Post author

      Oops. :hotflash:

      I will say that it has lasted. We’ve been here for 9 years and though it needs pressure cleaning, the rock just sits there. Though even with liners weeds grow through.

  13. Erinyes

    Getting rid of the rocks is easy. Hire a bunch of illegals at $3.00 an hour to rake them up and haul them off. Why the fuck not? Everyone else thinks to seem it’s okay including our Condom-in-Chief…

      1. patti

        I don’t know ’bout where you live, but here they get much more than 3 dollars and hour to work. no gathering at home depot because they have no trouble finding better work than day labor. it’s going to be legal americans gathering at lowe’s and home depot soon…

        1. pam Post author

          Yes, they get quite a bit more than 3 bucks an hour. YsD used to work day labor and sometimes she brought home close to 75. a day.

          1. patti

            I’m beginning to think my recent college grad daughter is going to have to go the day labor route….

            1. pam Post author

              Now that would SUCK. All that money for higher education and the workforce won’t bear another worker? Not good. :no:

              Tick Tock.

  16. Erinyes

    No water used. Smaller carbon footprint and all that. The Goreskin would be proud (if he wasn’t busy trying to get his poodle freak on)…

  17. Folly

    Speaking of rocks, my sister sent me a shirt she found in Key West. It has a picture of Obama on it and says, “Like a Rock…Only Dumber.”

    1. pam Post author

      :rofl:

      I love it!

      If I were an artist I could paint little pictures of the One on all these rocks and sell them to the idiots on eBay. Might be a slow way to get rid of the rocks, but since I’d be parting fools from their money, worth it in the long run.

      :D

      1. Folly

        Just paint, “Hope,” and “Change,” and that little red, white, and blue design they used. They’ll sell like hotcakes.

        1. pam Post author

          Great idea! Almost makes me want to try it, just to see how many would spring for a damn rock… plus shipping, of course!
          :rofl:

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